"Tarquin don`t squeeze those tea bags so hard and stop licking out the jammy dodgers."
Hello plebs, Norman here.
When I take on a writer I`m looking for a product. Someone who produces one mediocre book is of no use. It`s far more worth my while taking on a crap writer who can produce prolific amounts of garbage. It makes business sense. Even a modern classic has a limited lifespan. (Morrisey take note).
Every writer believes they are producing something which is worthy. Get real, you`re not! Indeed, my writers are fast efficient machines that can keep pumping stuff out. I`ve no time to accept those who continually intellectualise over every word and phrase. Your audience are all clueless and tired of any clever structuring you may impose on them.
True, you might get the odd smart Alec trying to make a name for themselves off your back. Namely people who call themselves reviewers but who are actually one step away from being trolls. But generally it`s fickle which wins the day. If you do manage to write a classic nobody will know about it until after you`re dead. Incidentally, this is when I receive maximum royalties.
"Tarquin - transfer those biscuits from the Lidl packet into the Waitrose special selection, celebration tin."
Hello plebs, Norman here.
When I take on a writer I`m looking for a product. Someone who produces one mediocre book is of no use. It`s far more worth my while taking on a crap writer who can produce prolific amounts of garbage. It makes business sense. Even a modern classic has a limited lifespan. (Morrisey take note).
Every writer believes they are producing something which is worthy. Get real, you`re not! Indeed, my writers are fast efficient machines that can keep pumping stuff out. I`ve no time to accept those who continually intellectualise over every word and phrase. Your audience are all clueless and tired of any clever structuring you may impose on them.
True, you might get the odd smart Alec trying to make a name for themselves off your back. Namely people who call themselves reviewers but who are actually one step away from being trolls. But generally it`s fickle which wins the day. If you do manage to write a classic nobody will know about it until after you`re dead. Incidentally, this is when I receive maximum royalties.
"Tarquin - transfer those biscuits from the Lidl packet into the Waitrose special selection, celebration tin."