Whey hey, Captain Alliteration at your service. I`m a bit wiped out after making a mercy dash to Michigan in the early hours. I got caught in the Jetstream and had to make a detour over Alaska. But it was worth the flight to take on my nemesis the Ice Queen, Feisty Fiona of Phucked up Format.
Indeed Feisty Fiona is a formidable adversary and haunts writers with every digital page turn. This bitch performs her icy conjuring on Kindle, Kobo and indeed any form of digital download. I`m talking, of course, how despite crafting a perfect copy of your work this bitch waves her icy hand and jumbles everything up with the press of a button. What looks good on your computer ends up a garbled mess when downloaded onto an E reader. Juxtaposed margins and indentations suddenly have a mind of their own and appear all over the place. Bizarre line spacing comes out of nowhere and chapter headings suddenly appear at the bottom of the page.
I`ve seen writers fall tot heir knees, weep and attempt to gouge out their own eyes with blunt pencils when finally seeing their work in Kindle format. That heartless bitch is indiscriminate with her victims.
Fear not, there`s a silver bullet which can be used to stop this wench. Her complete destruction will never be easy but help is at hand. You need to upload directly to createspace which is another formidable monster. If you can mange to master this ogre you`ll find that when you finally download to an E reader your result should be nigh on perfect.
One day Amazon may make this an easier program to use. However if you can master it you`ll find line spacing, headings and indentations should stay firmly where you put them and not where Kindle thinks they should be. Apologies for swopping one demon for another but the quest for perfection will never be easy. So - until the next time.
Sorry Guvnor, what`s that? You need a new set of Pirelli`s!
Indeed Feisty Fiona is a formidable adversary and haunts writers with every digital page turn. This bitch performs her icy conjuring on Kindle, Kobo and indeed any form of digital download. I`m talking, of course, how despite crafting a perfect copy of your work this bitch waves her icy hand and jumbles everything up with the press of a button. What looks good on your computer ends up a garbled mess when downloaded onto an E reader. Juxtaposed margins and indentations suddenly have a mind of their own and appear all over the place. Bizarre line spacing comes out of nowhere and chapter headings suddenly appear at the bottom of the page.
I`ve seen writers fall tot heir knees, weep and attempt to gouge out their own eyes with blunt pencils when finally seeing their work in Kindle format. That heartless bitch is indiscriminate with her victims.
Fear not, there`s a silver bullet which can be used to stop this wench. Her complete destruction will never be easy but help is at hand. You need to upload directly to createspace which is another formidable monster. If you can mange to master this ogre you`ll find that when you finally download to an E reader your result should be nigh on perfect.
One day Amazon may make this an easier program to use. However if you can master it you`ll find line spacing, headings and indentations should stay firmly where you put them and not where Kindle thinks they should be. Apologies for swopping one demon for another but the quest for perfection will never be easy. So - until the next time.
Sorry Guvnor, what`s that? You need a new set of Pirelli`s!